YEPITSPAT / Pat Byrnes


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Not a lot right now makes sense to me

Have you ever looked back at so many photos from your own life that you start asking yourself how you got here? Like I had mentioned in my previous post, I'm currently in the process of going through hundreds of thousands of photos, and I've really started to wonder how this happened.  Not just my own life, but everything in it and the people I know/knew, the places I've been, and the world as a whole.  How did we get here? How has the world, and all our own little world's on it, get here?  I'm not sure if it's just me or if everybody feels this at some point, but it feels as if for the last several years my life had been hijacked and my world changed without my consent.  I'm sure most people probably have some similar feeling at some point in life, I just wonder if they realize it while it's happening, or if it only hits them in retrospect.  I feel like my own life had been taken from me in small increments, some I feel I had realized while it was happening, others, only looking back.  I've fallen out of touch with so many old friends, I've lost almost as many; maybe it's the sleep deprivation, but I can't help but wonder what they're all up to these days, would they be anything like the people in the photos I've been going through? Are they all just remnants of who they were then? Do any of them ever wonder these things about me? And for the ones I lost, the ones who left their worlds and this one too early, what had happened since we had spoke last? All gone too early, many from consequences of their own actions, be it drugs, racing, drink driving, or suicide. All tragedies within their own respect, but I can't help but wondering if there had been anything that I could have done to have helped, could I have helped if only I had reached out?  I know that these are all practically incoherent ramblings and that asking myself these questions can't change the things that have been, this world is just so chaotic, and my life is no exception right now, I just wonder sometimes.

I was upset, angry, and I'm not sorry

Sleep? What's That?